


You Will Buy Churros

by ETNMystic



Category: Escape the Night (Web Series), Video Blogging RPF
Genre: Churros, F/F, F/M, I guess I do, andrea russett is an actual mystic, very gay, weird name for a fantasy story i know, who the fuck names a story 'you will buy churros'?
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-05-14
Updated: 2019-10-28
Packaged: 2020-03-05 07:32:44
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 6,223
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18824056
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ETNMystic/pseuds/ETNMystic
Summary: (It was 2 am when I started this. IDK what else to call it.)Liberty Anne Sullivan is the Princess of the Kingdom of Tiria. Up until this point, all of her life decisions have been made for her, and now when it comes to marriage, she wants to make her own decision.However the advisor from the Kingdom of Eluidal has her eyes on her and will stop at nothing to make her, and her kingdom's endless supply of churros, her very own.Yes, churros.





	1. Sixteen (Liberty Anne's POV)

Tiria wasn't always such a terrible place. 

Okay, I guess it never really has been, but it gets tiring after a while. And yet I'm supposed to rule over it AND one other kingdom. 

*sigh.* Okay. Enough of this narration bullshit.

Let's get the basics out of the way. I'm Liberty Anne Sullivan, Princess of the Tirian Kingdom, a luxurious haven with over 100 world-famous botanical gardens, over 500 libraries, over 75 different revolutionary amusement parks, blah blah blah. Oh yeah, and our main export is churros.

Yep, you heard that right. Our main export is

Mother.

Fucking.

_**Churros.** _

Lolly can't believe it either. I told her when she sought refuge from bandits from the Krosian Empire and she thought I was going nuts.

Anyway I'm turning sixteen and that's the minimum age of marriage throughout these territories. So I guess now there's this banquet that's supposed to happen tonight, and I've got to choose, at least hopefully I'll get to choose, my lifelong advisor, my "princess" squad I guess you could call it, and my fiance. 

"Maybe he'll be nice," Lolly shrugs as my chamber maid finishes touching up my banquet dress while Lolly bounces a bouncy ball against my wall.

"Yeah, maybe," I grumble as she stitches up a hole in the pink gown. 

Truth is, I fucking hate pink and I'm not sure I want it to be a he. Who says I can't marry a princess? But if I said anything, they'd probably go batshit insane. Yeah, I've had too many close calls with my parents coming across my gay fluff fics. The excuse of "they're just really close friends" will only work for so long until they send me to the madhouse. 

"Your majesty, please turn to your left," the chamber maid says gently. 

So I waddle like a fucking penguin in this uncomfortable dress with a corset that nearly merges my lungs together. Okay, maybe I'm exaggerating, but I have sensory issues, okay?

"Who's supposed to be there tonight?" I wonder.

"It's supposed to be a surprise," Lolly shrugs.

"I know, and I don't care. I'm not gonna make a decision on a dime."

"Oh, that won't be necessary," the chamber maid assures me even though this doesn't assure me in even the slightest.  
"Your parents will likely make the decision."

 _Great,_ I sigh. 

All of a sudden, a servant bursts in out-of-breath.

"The guests are arriving, please hurry with the princess."

The chamber maid nods and finishes a quick stitch before fitting a tiara on my curled hair. All of a sudden, I'm rushed towards the door.

"Aren't you coming?" I call out to Lolly as I claw against the door frame like a damn cat.

She shakes her head.

"Still too dangerous. The Krosian bandits could show up. But could you ask the chefs to send me up a plate of food."

"At least come down for that."

"I'm not risking my neck for food!"

"That's an anti-mood," I grumble.

"Oh!" she squeals as my grip loosens.  
"And ask one of the seers about my future please?"

She gives me those fucking puppy dog eyes and I huff.

"You're lucky you're so cute," I growl before I disappear downstairs where my parents will, as usual, decide on everything.

I swear, my parents will probably emerge from their fucking graves to decide my funeral details.

 

 

 


	2. Yeah, there's a lot of important people. (Liberty Anne's POV)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Also the Eluidal Advisor is creeping her out.

So I'm pushed down into the ballroom, which is dressed to the ninety-nines. My parents, along with making 99.9% of my life decisions, are never one to dress down, especially for this fucking shabam. Decor from everywhere in the realm and beyond. And the food. They have chefs from every kingdom, empire, and dynasty imaginable to make every fucking dish imaginable. Tirian Churros, Shaidia Dynasty Roasted Duck, Cadoran Mint Ice Cream, Lacurian Roasted Chicken, Lepisian Chickpea Hummus and Crackers, Asteacan Three-Tiered Cake, Tropisian Ambrosia, you name it, they've got it. 

It really makes me wish I wasn't wearing a fucking corset. 

I'm basically pushed to the front overlooking a red carpet embroidered with real fucking gold on the sides. And just in time, as the herald blows his damn trumpet and pulls out a long-ass scroll and clears his throat. 

"Presenting Prince Justin Caylen, Princess Lauren, and Advisor Cedar of the Loucarus Empire."

A blond guy, an Asian girl, and a well-dressed advisor step through the door, carrying gifts, the only part of the night I'm looking forward to, let's be honest. But they look so laidback, even though I know Princess Lauren is definitely wearing a corset. That's cause hers isn't as tightly tied as mine and that's a fact. The Loucarus Empire is the most relaxed and stress-free of us all. If Lauren wanted to marry a male prostitute, they'd be perfectly okay with that as long as he has a clean criminal record. Honestly I'm a bit envious. They're so unorthodox and yet they're still well-respected. Their empire also has some of the best textiles and clothing, their main export. I curtsey as much as I can, trying not to fall over. 

"Can't I loosen this corset?" I whisper to my mom as they step to the side.

"No," she snaps.  
"You need to make a good impression."

"But Lauren doesn't have to have her corset tied as tight."

"If Princess Lauren was allowed to jump off a cliff---"

_Honestly, at this point, yes._

But we're cut off by the next arrival. 

"Prince Alex, Princess Stella, Prince Roi, and Advisor Sequoia of the Ivetadia Empire."

An Asian guy, a girl with a bird feather dress, a reluctantly-well-dressed younger man, and another well-dressed advisor step through with gifts. Ivetadia has some of the coolest animals. Their menageries are some of the highest quality and well-kept and their animals are the best trained. Funny enough, their main export isn't animal products, actually. It's mechanical parts. They make some of the best motorcycles and automobiles

Okay, so next is Prince Czci----Cezcy---Chestnut, whatever, it begins with a C, and Advisor Haven of the Secrorsis Empire. We stay in touch with them, even though they're looked down on and seen as more unorthodox than Loucarus, even though they're basically a fantasy version of the Soviet Union, which is a country in the mortal world. But who could blame anyone when their kingdom sounds like some weird skin disease. Their main exports? Dance teachers. Yup, that's categorized as a genuine export. 

Before we go on, I just wanna clarify how the hell I know all this shit. This is really the only part of my princess lessons that could keep my attention. I dunno. It's interesting to learn about other cultures. Anyway, let's continue.

Next is  Prince Visev---Vista---Visa, another hard name and it begins with V, and  Advisor Darby of the....oh dear God, I hope I'm saying this right, the Vrosea Dynasty. They're relatively new to the realm's mainstream territory. I don't know what their main export is yet. They didn't teach me this shit in the lessons cuz they're not in the texts. 

Okay, this is taking too long, I'll just list them off in this format:

** Who: **

** From where: **

** Main Export: **

** Further comments: **

Got it? Good.

* * *

**Who: ** Princess Ines and Advisor Wynter

 ** From where:  ** The Athogon Kingdom

 ** Main Export:  ** Geometry textbooks, weird, I know.

 ** Further comments:  ** Probably one of the most mathematically-gifted kingdoms/empires/dynasties.

* * *

 **Who: ** Princess Nora and Advisor Parris

 ** From where:  ** The Storia Kingdom

 ** Main Export:  ** Storytellers

 ** Further comments:  ** I guess they're pretty creative.

* * *

 ** Who:  ** Prince Salazar and Advisor Rene

 ** From where:  ** The Sirus Dynasty

 ** Main Export: **  Serpentilinguists (people who talk to snakes) and Snake Charmers.

 ** Further comments:  ** I don't like the way Salazar was looking at me when they walked in. I swear he's part snake.

* * *

 ** Who:  ** Prince Asher and Advisor Hazel

 ** From where:  ** The Meovia Dynasty

 ** Main Export:  ** Cats, lots of cats.

 ** Further comments:  ** The dude's sweet, but really timid.

* * *

 ** Who:  ** Princess Andrea and Advisor Marly

 ** From where:  ** The Eyaelan Empire.

 ** Main Export: ** Optometrists

 ** Further comments:  ** I've heard Andrea's really good at fixing things. 

* * *

 ** Who:  ** Princess Nikita,  Royal Treasurer Roanoke,  Prince Manny,  Emperor Jeffree,  Prince James, Princess Laura, and  Advisor Briar

 ** From where:  ** The Ceris Empire

 ** Main Export:  ** Pretty much anything related to beauty.

 ** Further comments:  ** They've got the most controversy amongst any kingdom, empire, or dynasty. But damn, doesn't the Emperor look so fabulous! Prince James, major flirt, has to keep his gaze off of one of the guests because of their recent feud. Princess Nikita and Prince Manny are inseparable, but Prince Manny and Princess Laura have had to stay FAR away from one another. I've talked with Princess Nikita a few times and she seems nice but a bit blunt in her honesty. 

* * *

 **Who: ** Prince Destorm,  Princess Teala,  Royal Treasurer Ryu, and Advisor Safiya

 ** From where:  ** The Eluidal Kingdom

 ** Main Export:  ** No one's really sure. They don't export much of one thing. 

 ** Further comments:  ** Prince Destorm, I've heard he's very domineering and a bit full of himself. Princess Teala seems really sweet, but shy.

But I wanna talk about their advisor for a second. She's giving me serious creeper vibes. She's got on this black blazer, red dress, black tights, red heels, this weird snake charm on her hand, a snake belt, a black hat with a red ribbon, and ruby lapel pin. She's also got this weird bird on her shoulder who I swear to God tried to talk to me when I curtsied. She's kept her eyes locked on me since they entered. Well, on me and the gigantic plate of churros on the refreshment table. I swear that's like her sixth churro of the night. You'd think someone'd spiked them with alcohol or cocaine or something. 

* * *

**Who: ** Prince Sirius, Princess Tati, and Advisor Joey

 ** From where:  ** The Critelia Dynasty

 ** Main Export:  ** Second in beauty exports, but they use more organic ingredients. They also export crystals.

 ** Further comments:  ** Princess Tati refuses to be anywhere near Prince James, and he's not supposed to even LOOK at her. Makes sense cause they recently broke ties. They also have A LOT of wolves there. 

* * *

 ** Who:  ** Prince Dooper, Advisor Blueberry, and Jester Hightower

 ** From where:  ** (I swear I'm not making this up) The Kingdom of YEET! And yes, YEET! is supposed to be written like that.

 ** Main Export:  ** Don't know, but they're keeping their medical staff rolling in bank. Though actually, I take that back; they export a lot of food ingredients.

 ** Further comments:  ** Their favorite past time is YEET!ing. From my understanding, it's basically where someone shouts "Time to YEET!", everyone else shouts "YEET!", and then they launch themselves forward wherever they are. They have the highest mortality rate. Their advisor also has his hair dyed blue and barks on occasion. Weird, but okay.

* * *

 ** Who:  ** Princess Kyrie, Seer Mystic, and Advisor Blanche

 ** From where:  ** The Chadora Empire

 ** Main Export:  ** Mysticism texts

 ** Further comments:  ** Not everyone has them, but those kingdoms/empires/dynasties that are lucky enough will be gifted with a Seer. And this one happens to look a hell of a lot like me. Also their advisor has her hair dyed pink and winnies on occasion. I mean, we all have our quirks. 

* * *

 ** Who:  ** Princess Eleanora, Seer Andrea, and Advisor Jaiden

 ** From where:  ** The Crilan Empire

 ** Main Export:  ** Electricity

 ** Further comments:  ** I swear the princess is crazy. She's kinda restrained tonight, but every kingdom/empire/dynasty is under strict orders to not give her anymore than a single serving of four different kinds of sweets at parties. Anymore than that unleashes a hyperactive tasmanian she-devil. Also I highkey ship the Crilan Seer with the Chadoran Seer. Rumor has it they're dating. 

* * *

Okay, I'm getting kinda bored with this. I'll just skip to the ones I'm most interested in. 

* * *

**Who: ** Princess-Empress Lilly, Prince Scarbro, and Advisor Humble

 ** From where:  ** The Echothia Empire

 ** Main Export:  ** Snapbacks and maple syrup, so they're basically pseudo-Canada

 ** Further comments:  ** Prince Scarbro is so adorable in his little party outfit. Though he's a dog, so he technically can't become emperor unless the Empress approves. And knowing Lilly, who's wearing a snapback to the party, he probably will be the emperor. 

* * *

 **Who: ** Princess Rosanna, Princess Molly, Prince Greyson, Princess Cookie, Princess Blueberry Muffin, and Advisor Husky

 ** From where:  ** The Asteaca Empire

 ** Main Export:  ** Sweets and Pastries

 ** Further comments:  ** Princess Rosanna, my God, have you ever seen anyone more adorable and gorgeous and just amazing? And she's the absolute sweetest. If you can't tell, SHE is the one I want to marry. But my parents likely would not approve (See me having to make excuses for gay fluff fiction).

Prince Greyson is also absolutely adorable, but he's not even a year old so that explains A LOT. Princess Cookie and Princess Blueberry Muffin? Both French bulldogs, but could also rule if whoever is in charge gives the okay. 

* * *

So that's really the only ones I think you'd really care to hear about. I'm sure I'll write about more kingdoms/empires/dynasties as they become relevant. But I have ADD and I don't care to write you an entire history/cultural lesson on EVERY. SINGLE. TERRITORY. 

And the Eluidal Advisor has consumed her tenth churro. 


	3. Snakes, Ships, and Divinations (Liberty Anne's POV)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's gonna get a little bit gay in this chapter.

Okay, so I have to make A LOT of small talk (ew), ask about the exports, etc,. THIS makes me wish I wasn't an introvert with social deficits. 

That Eluidal advisor has not moved away from the refreshment table. Is she....is she guarding the churro plate? Whatever. She hasn't taken her eyes off of me and I'm creeped the fuck out. I'm hoping to get a chance to talk to Princess Rosanna again. She's so cute. She and the Authusalan Prince are like siblings too. But for marriage, HE's got his eyes on the princess from the Amotis Dynasty. I think her name's Stephanie. 

The princess from the Authusal Empire is also pretty cool. Really good singer and a huge collector of something called Pikachus. I told her about my ship between the Crilan and Chadoran Seers and she says she's 95% sure they're dating on the DL. Should I try playing Cupid between them? 

I dunno. But I'll get a chance to ask each of them a question about my future or someone else's future. But first food time. 

Okay, I just noticed that the advisor from the Eluidal kingdom is gone and so are my parents. Wait, there they are. And okay.....my parents look unnaturally happy. And now the servants are switching around some nameplates. I'm sure it's nothing.

*gets to spot at head of table.*

I retract that statement. The Eluidal advisor is sitting next to my left......

Fan-fucking-tastic. 

And now everyone's coming to sit down. Where the fuck is the bathroom when you need it? 

And now I'm being ushered to my seat. Ffffffabulous.

Okay, this might not be so bad. The Asteacan advisor's on my right. Okay, I gotta go into kinda fucking narration mode cuz shit's about to happen.

* * *

No one can sit down until I do. Some stupid royalty rule. When I was younger, it was fun. I used to pretend to sit down and then stand back up. Maybe because it's my birthday, I can get away with it once. 

"Princess Liberty Anne," a voice next to me purrs.

Guess fucking who?

The Eluidal advisor is smiling at me. It's supposed to be a kind smile, but I can sense that it's got this air of malice underneath it. She reminds me of the villain of this one mortal movie I saw with a genie lamp and a cobra staff and a goatee. Except she doesn't have a goatee. Just a plate full of churros and a stupid fucking bird on her shoulders. 

"Advisor Safiya of the Eluidal Kingdom," she introduces.  
"My speciality of advising is within all areas, including financial, fashion, and fiancees."

She goes into kiss my hand, but I quickly grab and shake it.

"Charmed," I greet her nervously. 

I turn and begin to sit down. Everyone follows to sit, but I shoot back up, snickering. I can feel my mother's fury radiating from the other end of the table.

"Liberty Anne Marie Sullivan---" she begins.

Safiya cackles with a mixture of amusement and malice.

"Come now, your majesty," she assures her.  
"It's her birthday. I'm sure you did the same when you came of age."

And now my mother's face is the color of a tomato, not with anger, but sheepishly. Of course she did the same thing. Dad's always talked about how mischievous she was when she was younger. My grandmom did the same and.....it basically runs in the family. Even dad did it on his birthdays. 

The table erupts in amused and endeared laughter. 

"Darling, no need to be so embarrassed," Empress Colleen of the Cadora Empire, not to be confused with the Chadora Empire, chortles as she cuddles with her son Flynn.  
"Why, we all did the same when we turned sixteen. In fact, I did the same thing every year until I was married at the age of twenty-one."

"You?" Empress Glozell of the Lepis Empire exclaims in shock.  
"I never took you for the type."

"I may be an empress," she replies.  
"But I do know how to have fun."

"Do forgive me if I'm intruding up your conversation, your majesties," Princess Celestia of the Ludenberg Empire announces, clearing her throat.  
"But my darling Prince Grand Bois Cheri is becoming quite famished. He's not used to eating so late."

She turns back to me.

"If you may, your majesty."

I glare at her, but huff and begin to sit down, but I take my time as I lock eyes with her. Prince Makoto of the Hope Empire is trying to get her to break eye contact, but he's stopped by the loud yowl of Prince GBC, one that shocks me so much that I plant my ass on the chair. 

Immediately the servants come around with appetizers.

"Churros for me, if you would," Safiya announces.

As they place her churros on her plate, she tries to strike up a conversation with me.

"How do you feel about snakes?"

"Not a fan," I reply bluntly, emulating Princess Nikita.

"What about jewelry?"

"It's okay."

"Would you like to see my newest accessory?"

"No thank you."

"I insist," she replies with a hint of anger in her voice.  
"That you give it a look."

I take a quick look and I catch the quick glow of red from the snake's eyes. I block my gaze and turn to the Asteacan advisor, trying to see if he can get me a conference with Princess Rosanna. At this moment, I catch the Chadoran Seer leaving, claiming needing a breath of air. A few minutes later, the Crilan Seer gets up to get some fresh air. The Authusalan princess and I smirk and ask to be excused for a few moments. 

Giggling like a couple of schoolgirls, we follow the Crilan Seer around the corner before stopping to listen.

"My love," she gasps.  
"I thought I'd never see you again."

"It feels like it's been too many damn years."

To my fangirl side's absolute joy, it's the voice of the Chadoran Seer. I have to bite my fucking tongue to keep me from squealing in delight.

"It's occasions like this that make me wish we could spend more time together," Seer Mystic sighs.  
"Do you think anyone knows?"

"I mean, it's bound to have spread to a few kingdoms, but under the current rule of Tiria, it's a crime."

"I'm certain Princess Liberty Anne will change that."

A few moments of silence before Mystic speaks up once again.

"I had a vision last night, but it's fuzzy. I can only recall a few things."

"What were they?"

"Um, Tiria, snake charms, glowing rubies, Eluidal, a ruby ring, and churros."

"Are you going to tell her?"

"I mean, if she asks, then I have no choice."

"Come now, my love. We've both perjured before."

"Yes, but that was for protection. If I keep this a secret from her, or even worse lie to her, it's only putting her in danger."

"Speaking of danger, I've got an update on the Krosian bandits from MY dreams," Andrea whispers.  
"They've been trying to locate the Trearado Kingdom bandits to see if they'll make an alliance."

"Indeed? How would an alliance do them any good?"

"Sources say that Trearado was built over a tunnel system, one that would lead them to the dungeons of this very castle. The spirits have also told me that the Krosian princess is hiding here."

"Queen Penelope would never allow such an alliance."

All of a sudden, I feel my hands slip and I fall against the stone. 

"You can come out, princesses," Andrea responds.  
"We know you ship us."

I peek out from the corner, my cheeks flushing red. Mystic gasps and stands up, studying me in amazement.

"Well, of all the forms the Gods of this realm hath given you, you and I share a similar face."

"Indeed," I nod.  
"Now I've got a question that I need answered."

"Now?" Mystic shivers.  
"I....don't think I'm at full power. Wait until the moonlit bonfire, please."

"Okay, but can you at least tell me this? Is the Eluidal advisor someone I should be wary of or am I just being paranoid?"

Mystic gasps.

"You heard that? How do you---?"

"She's been staring at me since she arrived, and she tried to get me to look at this snake charm."

"Stay away from her snake charm," Mystic replies forcefully.  
"And stay as far away from her as you can. I'll divine more on this. But for now, we should all return to the banquet. I'm sure people will begin to wonder if we don't."

As we return, Mystic pulls me aside and whispers in my ear.

"Come to the bonfire pit at the furthest end of the palace's backyard. The one inside of the tent. It'll be safe to talk more on Eluidal and their advisor."

I nod and we both follow the other two back inside.


	4. Planning and Shit

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Exactly what it says on the tin.

After the banquet, which has a shit-ton of food by the way, it's Tirian tradition to have a sunset/moonlight bonfire with not just roasting marshmallows, but also specifically-made s'mores, ones that are supposed to be prayed over as it's made to a T. It is SO fucking difficult to make because there are SO. MANY. DAMN. RULES. I'll let you in on an abridged/paraphrased version.

  * The marshmallow must be roasted to a perfectly-even golden hue on all sides.
  * Once it's roasted, your hands must not touch it. Like at all. You have to carry it to specially-ranked servants, ones who were blessed by the Gods so THEY can remove it from your stick. They're tested and trained from an early age by priests in isolated temples.
  * Once the marshmallow is removed, you have to keep your eyes and/or mind on it the ENTIRE time it's being made. You also start thinking about something you want for the next year, shit like wisdom, love, luck, a present. And it can be for anyone. And if you're at a birthday party, and you decide to make one for yourself, you are MANDATED to also make one for the birthday person. 
  * And it doesn't end after it's made. Oh no. If the s'more is for yourself, you have to bite into it a certain way so that you get equal parts graham cracker, chocolate, and marshmallow on the first bite. If you accomplish that, your wish is guaranteed to come true. 
  * If you make one for someone else, you must kneel before them and present it. If you're on the receiving end, you're not required to take it, but it's customary to accept it. But if you accept it, the wish comes true for you. The Gods don't seem to give a shit about how it's eaten at that point.



Needless to say, I generally stay away from s'more-making.

Besides, there are other things I prefer during these bonfires. Musicians and entertainment, for one. The style of music is generally reflective of the primary cultural background of a territory which is often based off of cultures that I learned are prevalent in the mortal realm. Because Tirian is located in what I like to call "Ye Olde Indo/Euro-Renaissance Territory," we have a mix of sort of Middle Eastern and European Renaissance/French Revolution style music. So one minute, you might be doing a European waltz and the next you've got representatives from territories more influenced by Middle Eastern/Indian culture performing a complex kathakali, which roughly translates to "story performance." I guess it's kind of like interpretive dancing or even musicals in a sense, except you have dancers who only do the choreography and then off to the side, you have vocal artists giving the dialogue/lyrics. Sometimes there will be other styles of music, such as having representatives whose territories are more influenced by Chinese, Korean, Vietnamese, Thai, Japanese, and Filipino cultures, some of the most notable being theatrical performances such as the Peiking Opera, Noh, Bunraku, and Kabuki theatre; a few whose influences come from Haitian, Jamaican, and various African cultures; and those whose cultural influences stem from Columbia, Mexico, Peru, Spain, Portugal, and even reviving traditions from the Mayan and Aztec periods in the mortal realm. . But generally, Tirians stick with what we know and don't really like difference, which is why we ~~kinda~~  really suck.

Aside from musicians and entertainment, there's also games, arts, crafts, storytelling and singing around a bonfire, but the main reason these bonfires are held, especially at sixteenth birthday parties, is because everyone in the family, and a few close friends of the birthday person, can ask 1 question to any of the Seers in attendance. They can ask as many Seers as there are, but tradition is that it's a single question per Seer.

Well tonight, fuck that tradition. I've got questions that need answers.

Trouble is, the Eluidal advisor keeps following me, but maintaining a safe distance so that it just looks coincidental. Could someone PLEASE distract her with churros? 

As soon as I can see her looking away, the Authusalan Princess, who I find out is named Gabbie, and I slip into the tent where Mystic and Andrea are waiting with a bonfire and a hole for the moonlight to shine on them.

"So what's up with the Eluidal advisor?" I ask.  
"Aside from her obvious churro addiction."

"She's got plans to take over Tiria," Andrea replies.  
"In order to do that, however, she needs a marital connection. And since you are the only heir to the kingdom---"

"I'm fucked," I finish.

"Yeah, basically."

"Actually," Mystic pipes up.  
"There might be a way to keep her from ruling and marrying you."

"What would that be?" Gabbie wonders.

"Defection. You'd run off to another kingdom and the throne is held off-limits; then if you're not found within twelve months, the throne goes to one of the heirs of another kingdom."

"Defection's too dangerous, though," I worry.  
"No one's ever been able to successfully defect from their own kingdom. Security is too vigilante. And then those who are found after defection are forced to be married immediately and then placed under strict watch for life. If the Eluidal advisor becomes buddy-buddy with my parents while I defect and then I'm found, the chances of me marrying her are 95%. Even though my parents aren't a fan of same-sex marriage, I'm sure the advisor would be able to charm them into reconsidering their position on the matter."

"Maybe, but it might be your only chance to marry the Asteacan princess," Andrea sighs.  
"And don't act so surprised that we know about your crush on her. You literally have no poker face in those situations."

"But I can't disgrace her like that. She doesn't deserve the overvigilance if she defects too."

"Well, neither do you," Gabbie points out.  
"And you also don't deserve to get hitched to a churro addict with hypnotic snake jewelry."

This catches me slightly off-guard.

"I'm sorry. She has what now?"

"Her snake bracelet has the power to make anyone putty in her hands in less than ten seconds," Mystic shivers.  
"I've seen it before. Kingdoms who have fallen recently fell by emptying their treasuries completely due to a bet they struck and a single look at her bracelet."

"So  _that's_ how Eluidal got so rich overnight!" Gabbie gasps.

Andrea nods.

"Funnily enough, one of the only places she's made bets with that _hasn't_ crumbled to the ground is the Ludenberg Empire. Rumor has it that Princess Celeste has never lost a bet or a gamble in her life."

"I wish I had that kind of luck," I grumble.

"Oh shoot!" a voice gasps.  
"Sorry. Didn't mean to intrude."

I look over to see Princess Alice of the Aizairenth Dynasty. We've had a few conversations together and she seems nice enough. Maybe she can help us out. 

"No, it's cool," I shrug.  
"C'mon. Have a seat."

We fill her in on what the fuck is going on and she agrees that defection might be the only option.

"But it's risky," she adds.  
"Everyone knows what happens if you're caught before twelve months are up."

"That's why we have to go further than just to another kingdom," I tell them, getting a burst of an idea.  
"We have to go to the Hidden Nation and find the Celestial Fields."

Everyone gasps.  
  
"But no one's ever made it to the Hidden Nation, let alone to the Celestial Fields!" Mystic exclaims. 

"Then maybe we can be the first! The Celestial Fields are untraceable, and yet they watch over every kingdom in every realm. The Divinity Queen may be able to cast protection over all of us and stop the advisor from taking over."

"But you've got to have a pure heart for her to allow that," Andrea groans.

"Well, I'm screwed," Gabbie mumbles.

"We might be," I sigh until I hear a lyrical giggle.

I peek outside and there she is. I smile as my heart flutters. That's when it hits me.

"But I think I know someone who isn't."

 


	5. Wingprincess

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> *does the Orange Justice.* I have anxiety around people.

So the thing is I wanna talk to this princess, but........... **update:** there's  _another_ princess who is just so beautiful. She's from the Aegean Empire and her name is Theia. On top of that, guess what? Same-sex marriage is legal there! But I digress. I have major anxiety around people, so talking to her is a task. I decide to have Princess Alice talk me up to both Rosanna and Theia, and see if they wanna gtfo with us. But while she's doing that, guess who I happen to get stuck with?

"Princess Liberty Anne."

Fuck.

"Oh. Madame Nygaard," I laugh nervously.  
"What a.....surprise."

"Please. Call me Safiya."

Great. Only one night at the same event and she wants us on a first-name basis? Wonderful. I try to get away.

"Where are you going?" she asks.  
"I was thinking mayhaps we could get to know each other a bit more."

"That's lovely, but I was just about to, uh......."

"Oh, certainly you could delay whatever it is, couldn't you? Just for a few moments together?"

"Um....no....I don't believe I can."

" _Certainly you could._ "

So we're going for a threatening atmosphere, are we? Lovely. Just lovely. And it's at that moment, she grabs my wrist.

"Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa!" I exclaim, pulling away.  
"Maybe you should ask first."

"Oh," she remarks.  
"My apologies, it was merely an accident."

Accident, my ass. That was a deliberate grabbing of the wrist! That was a wrist plan, a wrist plot, a wrist......*searches for synonyms for plan.* A wrist.....strategy? You get the idea! That was intentional!

"I was hoping we could talk and you could help me polish my accessory."

Bitch, which one?

"Which one do you mean?" I ask as politely as I can. 

"This lovely snake charm."

She holds up her hand and I try to avoid looking. 

"Oh, um, well, I....I'm not really a fan of snakes, you know?"

"Spend a little time with me, and perhaps I'll change your mind."

"You really don't have to. You've already taken enough time out of your day as it is to come to this party. I don't wish to pester you for anything more."

"Please don't fret. The pleasure is all mine."

"No, truly. You shouldn't be spreading yourself so thinly."

"I'm quite the extravert. I'm at my very best around people."  ~~(LOL WTF is that like i'm an introvert)~~

"I'm afraid then that we're quite the opposite of each other."

"Well, you know what they say about opposites; they attract."

I feel as though I'm being backed into a wall, both literally and figuratively. I hesitate to glance around in fear that she'd catch me. I don't have a way out! My heart is thumping furiously, and I'm praying intensely that help is on the way. 

"Liberty Anne!" a voice calls out, rushing over to my side.

I glance over to see Princess Alice with Rosanna and Theia by her side.

"Your parents are looking for you."

The Advisor lets me pass and I rush over to Alice.

"Why do they need to see me?"

"They don't."

I smirk. 

"You're one of the best."

We rush back over to the tent where the two Seers are waiting.

"You brought them both!" Mystic sighs in relief.  
"Where's Lollypop?"

I'm stunned as fuck.

"How did you---?"

"I'm a Seer. Duh!"

Oh. Right.

"Lolly's in my room."

"So she's the one hiding," Alice realizes.

"Yeah."

We all sit down as Andrea lays out a huge map of the entire realm. And by huge, I mean  _ **HUGE**_. 

"Okay, Tiria is the kingdom furthest south of the Northern border of Krouvaria, meaning it's the furthest away from Aeclepia, and even further away from the Celestial Fields," she begins.  
"Meaning, we'll have to travel through all of the provinces and the kingdoms within them. Unfortunately, this also means that there's no way around this: we'll have to travel through the entirety of the Ember Vale."

This sends a huge fucking chill up my spine. The Ember Vale is the worst place to be, well aside from Tiria. Because that's where people go when they fucking  _die._ You heard me right. This is where the dead are.

"Fuck that," Gabbie shivers.  
"I'm not doing that shit."

"We need all the help we can get," Mystic begs.  
"It's gonna be one hell of a journey."

"But don't people who go through the Ember Vale not come back?" Alice quivers.

"From what I hear," Theia points out.  
"That is mere superstition."

"Superstition or otherwise," Andrea continues.  
"We'll have to go through there either way. It's between paths to the Celestial Fields within the Hidden Nation."

"But that also means we have to go through the Arctic Realm," I gulp.

"It shouldn't be too bad," Rosanna comments.  
"In Asteaca most everyone's trained in cold weather survival in case of a surprise blizzard."

"Y'all are prepped for anything," Andrea gasps.

Ro shrugs.

"It's just in our nature."

"Okay, so then here's our plan: we need to leave tomorrow night. It'll give us more time to pass through Krouvaria. We'll have to clear Tiria, or even Krouvaria entirely, before dawn. Once we reach the Northern border, we'll have to sneak out. There are a few acres of unclaimed land in between provinces and a few of the kingdoms where defectors can be caught by either kingdom. This means we'll have to clear those quickly.   
"Next we clear Inuvell, then Iaclerical, Asheadu, The Tempest Region, The Barren Vale is where we'll need to be extra careful, next is Cresteadour, then Naevaria, and Vezelux. As far as I know, that should take us out of ruler's territory. Once we do, we'll plan our next moves before we reach the Arctic Realm."

"How the fuck are we gonna do that?" I stammer.

"There's a small safehouse for travelers in the patch of land between the end of Vezelux and the Arctic Realm. We can rest and plan there."

"Whoa, okay, can we slow down please?" Alice asks.  
"This is making my head dizzy."

"We're almost there."

There are a few more places she mentions, but I tune her out. 

"So we clear?"

"Yup," I say absentmindedly.

"You didn't hear a word I said, did you?" 

"Nope."

Andrea sighs.

"At least you're honest."

"And....the Ember Vale?" Alice gulps.

"We'll cross that bridge when we get to it. Now for the rest of the night, stay away from that advisor. Try to find some sort of excuse to stay close by after your representatives leave."

"I've heard there's supposed to be a storm," Ro says.  
"Maybe we could be some of the last to leave, and then hide when it's time to go."

"Good luck with that."

We finish discussing over plans. Most of the time, we keep to ourselves in that tent, which is surprisingly roomy. Soon each kingdom files out. Just as the Asteacan Empire begins to leave, a storm appears. All of us take shelter and the girls all sleep in my room.


End file.
